Love the sound of rain…

I haven’t been posting as much which is going to change shortly, as my health comes back around after the changing of the seasons that happens to screw me every year almost like clockwork…I am going to start getting my shit together and doing what I need to do.

However, I have learned over the years what “pushing it” can do and I’m not gonna be stupid anymore…so, I’m taking it slowly…but, expect more like a post a day or at least a couple a week coming up.

So, right now I just got done showering, I’ve been super busy the last couple of days trying to catch up on stuff after a surgery, and general CF stuff, as well as Spring cleaning, and all kinds of other stuff going on…we’ll just say my schedule is jacked the hell up.

But, back to my topic….rain. I’m sitting here listening to music and I have now turned it off, so I can listen to the rain, I love the rain…it relaxes, de-stresses, and allows for a “white noise” type of sound that can be used to enhance an already relaxing task like meditation.

So I am about to mediate and I am loving that its raining because now I don’t need any Zen music to play, I have the rain…lol.

I guess this was kind of a weird all over the place post…it is kind of my brushing the cobwebs off post. Getting my typing skills back down and used to being used on a daily basis for something other than mundane tasks.

Well, I am done rambling…lol. Hopefully everyone has a great weekend.

The Return…

So, it has been a pretty long time since I’ve posted anything, I haven’t been doing too well health wise, but trying to keep my spirits up.

I had some really bad CF rundown, and then a week ago I had a broken tooth extracted…that’s 3 now in less than 2 years, ughhh!

But, I don’t want to let this blog go stagnant, however I have to admit it has been low on my list of priorities, especially being in pain and not being able to take pain medicine…I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but I have had a problem with pain meds in the past, doctors will fuck you up if you’re not careful…

Anyways, I’m doing a good bit better now, still not totally healed up, but on my way for sure…hopefully!?

After my Mollie girl left us, I had a pretty rough couple of weeks, then an extraction and now I’m finally starting to come out the other side, but its a bitch to say the least.

However, I am a strong willed person and I wont let things defeat me anymore, besides killing me I’m not gonna stop. So, good…but, kind of morbid I know, lol…

Well, I just wanted to get back into the swing of things and get y’all updated on my situation…im not dead…lol! I hope everyone has had a good spring break, Easter, or anything you’ve been up to really…

And finally, I will be posting regularly again, and am actually thinking about upgrading my site subscription for some different benefits and more personalization, maybe starting to branch out a bit and see how it goes…so wish me luck!

Thanks for reading and hope everyone is doing well!

– Will

 

Stay Positive

So, lately I’ve been having a rough time both physically with the Cystic Fibrosis, and also a little bit mentally.

Physically, I’ve been having a rough time with the allergy season, It has sapped my energy, and made my face itchy, watery, and red…lol…it sucks…

Mentally, I’m having a bit of trouble, I’m alone a lot and I’m struggling to figure out what to do with my downtime, especially when I don’t have energy to do shit…

Making yourself do things when you don’t feel good is one thing, but when you feel extra shitty, its damn near impossible, and when moving is taxing it takes it to a whole new level.

I see and hear about what people are doing and it bums me out…I try my hardest to stay positive, which is very hard to do, and 5 years ago I would’ve had a serious breakdown by now, probably gone on a bender and paid for it for several months afterwards. Now, I have gotten my shit together since then, but mentally it is never going to be easy to go through life with CF.

I am always going to have to be strong mentally, not being rock solid will lead to my demise, and not metaphorically, but literally…it definitely takes a toll on you knowing things will NEVER get easier, in fact they’ll only get harder.

It is a mind f#ck and then some…but, I am strong, and I will stay positive, and I will make it…

I have made the resolve of my inner strength being solid, I have an iron will, and it cant be broken. Maybe temporarily damaged, but nothing will ever break me totally again, ever. To tell the truth knowing that is the only thing that keeps me going…is that I wont break, life will have to get rid of me to break me, and even then I hope to leave behind a legacy that outlasts my time here physically.

With that I’m gonna go listen to some rap, and get in the mood to dominate when I wake up tomorrow!! Do what you gotta do…

 

Feeling better!

So, if you’re following any of my posts you know I had a small breakdown just a day ago…well, like I said in that post they don’t last too long  and I already feel a good bit better.

But, it did a number on me that day, and night…so much so that I had to dip into my reserve of anxiety meds which I don’t like to take a lot for that particular reason, when I need them I NEED them to work…lol. and the less you take them the better they work when you need them.

With something like Cystic Fibrosis this kind of thing is unavoidable, it happens incrementally thought the week, you have ups and downs, but some days are literally just hell on earth type days, that one was falling into that category for sure!

Anyways, I handled it as best I could, and shared it with y’all to show you how easily it is to go from “good” to “bad” with something like CF and not in a physical way (well yes physically) but that time more so mentally…So, I took my meds, meditated, then hooked up to some video games to blow some steam off…it worked, by the time late night/early morning rolled around I was able to sleep a bit, and today am doing much better!

So, with that I am going to go watch some basketball, as Northwestern made history today making it into and then winning their first NCAA tournament, something 78 years in the making. But, that and a couple of other games totally screwed my bracket up…oh well, that’s “March Madness” for you…lol.

Hopefully everyone has a good rest of the week, and if you’re watching these games have as much fun as I do getting into them!

 

 

 

Bracket has held up…so far.

So, it’s March Madness and they call it that for a reason, a lot of strange occurrences happen…not actually strange, but different than what the “on paper” outlook says about how things will go…

Anyways, I filled out my bracket two nights ago I think, and as you’re filling it out you get little “hints” from the organization with which you fill out the bracket about who should win, or who has better odds of winning. However, if you’ve ever watched the NCAA tournament before you know you CANNOT bank on what is supposed to happen. The only way you can have a real chance and purposefully filling out a good bracket is to have followed the teams during regular season. You have to know who plays well, but not only that…who plays well under pressure, who plays well injured, who hits big time shots and makes big time plays. You have to know the ins and outs of particular teams, players, and even coaches to really have a good understanding of who will go places in the tournament.

Having said all that its still a crapshoot. You can follow every team all season and still blow your bracket in the first couple of games because that how March Madness goes! But, that’s also what makes it fun, entertaining, and exhilarating…

If you are a fan of college basketball I hope you’ve enjoyed these first couple of games, and enjoy the rest…I know I will!

 

March Madness has begun!!

So, I think the official date is the 14th, but college basketball has taken over the TV…and I love it. It’s one of those things that gives me natural energy, and a “natural high.”

I’ve already gotten to watch like 5 games of matchups I really wanted to see…Duke beat UNC the other night…and right now I’m watching Kentucky v Alabama, and its a great game so far.

For the next couple of weeks I will have several basketball games a day that I WANT to watch and several others that I can watch if nothing else good is on. Some people get mad because their shows get overridden, but not me, lol…sorry not sorry.

Anyways, I’ve literally re-planned my whole daily schedule around this games and then Duke platys again tonight at 9pm…I think.

Hopefully, you had a good week, and are having a good weekend. If you have a basketball jones like I do, enjoy!

Interesting

It’s late Thursday evening, and I am finishing up on some stuff I had to do today, and I just signed onto my social media where I noticed a couple of comments, on some posts I have recently made.

The posts were nothing crazy, just observations on the political landscape, the irony of said landscape, and the hypocrisy with which so many people operate these days.

So in particular there was a post about health insurance, which if you have read any of my previous posts, you know I have Cystic Fibrosis, and have not been able to qualify, in any way, for decent/affordable coverage in several years.

However, strangely since Trump has become POTUS, I have received several phone calls, and even a positive response to some applications I sent in for assistance, and health insurance, where before I was basically just ignored, or immediately turned down.

But, like I said in the past few weeks, after my latest attempt to get some sort of coverage I was actually contacted by a few companies and even a representative who had been assigned my “case.”

So, I made the connection that maybe this administration has put a fire under the asses of some of these tit suckling government workers who care not ONE BIT about you as is obvious by the way they treat you when you call, or go in person to their department’s brick and mortar building.

Now, having recently signed on to my social media I am getting all kinds of weird responses to my comments, including but not limited to disbelief of my condition, distrust in my reason for applying for help, and even veiled threats towards me/ negative wishes about my health.

Sadly, I am kind of used to seeing this stuff, but have never been the grunt of said negativity…and its very disconcerting, but more so disappointing. I am the kind of person who doesn’t wish ill on anyone, even those with whom I disagree, but generally I wish everyone well, and hope that they don’t have the same kinds of issued just living their lives as I do, on a daily basis.

We live in a world where Rapper’s and “movie star’s” are put on an almost godly pedestal, setting them up in many young people’s eye as something to strive to be…and at the same time we as a society criticize people like Tim Tebow who are REAL role models in similar societal statuses (as far as money and fame go). It is just pathetic…and disheartening to watch people who are actually trying to make our country and the world a better place, get vilified. Meanwhile, the most narcissistic, hedonistic, and many times criminal figures in our society are basically given a free pass to do, say, and be poor excuses for role models, and generally not good people.

Anyways, I guess my point to this post is we should re-evaluate the way we categorize people in our society, and the way we portray them to our young impressionable minds. It is sad to think kids growing up would grow up thinking its ok to treat fellow American’s so badly, and not have it even be a problem. We should be treating each other with respect, even if we disagree politically, socially, culturally, or whatever.

If we just treated each other better, there wouldn’t be some much division, we would get much more accomplished because we could work together better, and we wouldn’t have so many people who feel ostracized for reason’s out of their hands, or based on something they had little control over.

This post is kind of all over the place, so sorry…rant over…lol. Hopefully everyone has a good rest of the week, and into the weekend as well.

 

 

Getting back into Jiu-Jitsu

So, I have been feeling up and down recently having both good stretches, and bad stretches…back and forth.

I have decided to start doing everything I can do to get my physical health back to where I would like it to be. And I’m not going to take no from my body for an answer…so I am going to go up and speak to my of jiu-jitsu coach and see about getting re-enrolled in some classes. And I’m excited, to say the least…

I have decided in an attempt to secure some of the stuff I’ve recently been discussion in my blog that this is the best course of action, to build myself up to appoint where I am a viable option to corporations.

Anyways, hopefully within the next few weeks, I will have some of this stuff hashed out and figured out totally!

I will keep you updated as I plan to bring you along on my journey!

Change in Progress!

I have been putting a lot of time and effort into making this page something besides a “blog page.” I want it to be interactive, to give us CFer’s, who sometimes have more time on our hands and time for our brains to go to dark places something to do. A place to come to just kill some time, or do something distracting. I am working on some very cool, or at least I hope that it is cool, stuff for this new site. Some interactive stuff, some story sharing, or maybe even real time chat, or discussion type setup.

I have been putting several hours a day not just into creating this new template, and design of my page, but trying to take it away form being just a blog. So, I hope you enjoy it, and it will be changing for probably a couple of weeks. When I am done though it should be pretty AWESOME!

I hope my ideas, design choices, and new direction of this is something y’all enjoy, and if you would share it with people you know so I can reach out to some other folks, who either have or know someone who has CF, I would really appreciate it.

I am worn out, as I have been looking at a computer screen for several hours a day at least for the past several days. So, please forgive the lack of new blog posts, and the “construction” of this new setup and design that I am implementing. Hopefully, when it is done, it will all be worth it. Goodnight, hope everyone has a great weekend.

New Site Layout!

So, I’ve been working on my blog and have somewhere around 30 posts, give or take a couple..

Recently I noticed I didn’t like the layout of my site, so I started doing some research and trying to find ways to transfer the info to another template, and then I saw how easy it was to do, and I did it.

It is still the same basic format, just much easier on the eye, in MY opinion, but I also did some research in terms of watching videos on YouTube, reading other blogs finding out what they like or don’t like, and what is visually pleasing.

I picked out a new template, fiddled with it for a few hours and BOOM, I have a new template, and reconstructed layout to my blog site! And I love it, hopefully others feel the same.

Anyways I am super tired tonight, as I’ve had a pretty rough day in terms of the Cystic Fibrosis symptoms…coughing a lot, sneezing a lot (more to do with seasonal allergies), really sick to my stomach for most of the day, but I  focused and got it done.

I am not finished and will probably be tinkering with it for a much longer period of time each day…lol. Good old OCD for you…

So, let me know what you think, leave a comment, share it with your friends…lets raise some awareness and help some people BREATHE! Have a goodnight, thanks for reading.